Behavior #11: Listen First

Scripture

“…let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath” 
James 1:19

What Listen First is
  • Listen  before  you  speak.  
  • Understand.  
  • Diagnose.  
  • Listen  with  your  ears  –  and your eyes  and  heart.  
  • Find  out  what  the  most  important  behaviors  are  to  the people   you’re  working  with.  
  • Don’t assume you  know  what  matters  most  to others.  
  • Don’t   presume  you  have  all  the  answers  –  or  all  the  questions.      
What Listen First is not –  
  • To  speak  first  and  listen  last,  or  
  • Not  to  listen  at  all    
What can seem like Listening First, but is just a counterfeit -
  • Listening  without  understanding 
  • Pretending  to  listen
  • Spending   “listening”  time  formulating  your  reply
  • Focusing  only  on  getting  out  your   agenda.  

3 comments:

DannyLSmith said...

“…let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath” James 1:19

Most Christians would say they “trust God.” My purpose in the next 6-7 minutes is to get you to think about Listening Well at work and that you’d leave here with some practical applications to increase your Trust in God, yourself and others as it relates to your work.

Stephen M.R. Covey says “Low trust causes friction, whether it is caused by unethical behavior or by ethical but incompetent behavior….Low trust is the greatest cost in life and in organizations, including families……Low trust slows everything – every decision, every communication, and every relationship.

On the other hand, trust produces speed…..the greatest trust building key is “results.”

Results build brand loyalty. Results inspire and fire up a winning culture….Consistent results also put suppliers and customers under the main tent as strategic partners…”

Page xxv of Forward in Speed of Trust

DannyLSmith said...

An example of Listening well -

1 Samuel 26:1-25 – In these verses of scripture David displays an example of listening well, an act of loving the unlovable -

David initiated contact with Saul and set the stage for communication
David appealed to Saul’s sense of right and wrong
David asked questions and listened for a heartfelt response
David asked Saul to listen so he could share his perspective
David was determined to own up to anything he had done wrong
David submitted himself to Saul
David offered forgiveness and reconciliation as an act of trust in God
David displayed love in everyway in this exchange. As you hear people today, listen to them by loving the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, strength and mind, and loving others as you love yourself. Trust is in direct relationship to this verse about love.

Additional scripture about listening; 1 Samuel 3:1-3, Job 2:11-13, Habakkuk 1:1-11, Luke 2:42-52

DannyLSmith said...

A Biblical example of not Listening well -

2 Chronicles 10:15 “So the king did not listen to the people; for the turn of events was from God, that the Lord might fulfill His word….” (NKJ)

In this example the king’s hunger for power, unreasonable demands, poor decision and unwillingness to listen ultimately led to his destruction.

Listening and hearing are two separate things. While we all hear as it’s a function of our ears, listening is a willingness, even a response to hearing.